Exerting effort in the relationship doesn’t work, but what does work is allowing the man to roll up his sleeves and earn your respect and affections. Men like to provide; it makes them feel worthy and validated in their manhood when they can be of service to a woman.
2. Say what you mean and mean what you say.
The fastest way to make a man love you is to earn his respect and awe. A woman who knows her boundaries can demurely and simply communicate them, and can stick to enforcing them will do just this.
I spent years afraid to speak up, thinking that a man would dump me if I said something that upset him. And I mistakenly a$$umed that most everything would upset men — a desire to take things slow $exually, a desire to spend more time together, a desire to be called back within a few hours and not after a few days.
What ended up happening? I turned into a doormat, and doormats are angry. It’s a very powerless position to be in. I ended up having an angry vibe about me that came across as brittle and needy. Plus, when I did try to communicate, my message was indecipherable and men got confused about what I wanted. It’s best to be honest, direct and get straight to the point.
3. Stop talking and start listening.
Women have a lot to say and we need a man to listen to all our issues. However, men need to talk, too. And often times we miss a man’s cues to be heard because they’re much more subtle. A guy isn’t going to say, “Can you please listen to me?” or, “Can I tell you all about my day?”
But he does desperately want you to listen when he shares a story or asks your advice on something. He needs you to stop what you’re doing (put the phone, your workload, the dishes, or child down) and hear him out. He needs you to listen with more than your ears and hear past his spoken words.
